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Love & Marriage, My Thoughts, Relationships

Women and Lingerie

I know I am not the only woman who has spent a little too much money on lingerie put it on and then it is off 1 minute later… and your thinking “Why the heck did I just spend that money? I should have bought a new pair of shoes!” If you have had that thought before, give me a thumbs up, leave a comment or share this post, this one is for the ladies and their men who should learn to appreciate lingerie a little bit more. Women and lingerie are like a girl without shoes.

Women and Lingerie. Why Women Wear Lingerie?

Because of how it makes us feel!
We are all pretty familiar with foreplay and there are those who like long foreplay and those who like it kind of quick and then those who like to skip it all together! One thing you cannot deny is that to have a good romp session you have to BOTH be in the mood. I do not want to speak for all women, I am only acting as voice for women that I do know and well my own opinions and experiences of course. Lingerie is to women, what a cape is to a super hero. It makes us feel just as good as how a man feels when he puts on his favorite teams jersey. You walk a little taller, have a little jump in your step and no one can wipe that extra “Umph” off your face. To keep it simple, we just feel that much more sexy and get that much more turned on knowing and thinking of how turned on we can get our men. Wearing plain Jane undies is no match to a nice lace thong. It makes us stand taller, have a Colgate Smile, and have a little more sas in our step. I am not sure how many women still wear it, buy it and surprise their men with it, but it is a beautiful act that shouldn’t be killed.

What Men Can Do To Keep Lingerie Alive?

It is as simple as two things:
1. Say She Looks Hot
2. Keep It On!
… at least a little bit longer before you rip it off….

Yes, I know you may want to tear it off their body right away, but tearing it off right away I am telling you women think, “Dang it! He didn’t even notice or appreciate it”. Remember a girl feels sexy and powerful in a bustier or sexy lace. When you take it off way to fast, you kill that feeling. So, next time simply fight the urge and let her keep it on. Just think, the longer the lingerie stays on the better the foreplay will be. Why? Because when a woman has her lingerie on, she has that extra sexual energy going through her and she wants to give and get some good, good lovin.

Just think? Do you want her coming to bed in granny PJs??? Of course not!

So do not discourage the attempt or tradition, encourage it. Just like anything in life. Human beings do things for approval and validation. This is no exception. If you stop or do not give the validation or show your appreciation for it, then she is likely to just stop wearing it.

Not much more to say about this… it is a “Just Sayin” post

Entrepreneur's Corner, My Thoughts

Why Men Who Work Hard Are Attractive To Women

Why Men Who Work Hard Are Attractive To Women. Who go to work. Who fix things and drill and kill bugs when we see them. It’s in our nature. I didn’t write the human code or our DNA or talk to Adam and Eve about their issues, I just know it’s a fact of life and it’s a fact of male and women tendencies.  I am so thankful that my husband is one of those men. I grew up around a laboror man.. my father is the hardest working man I know! This man cannot just sit around. He knows how to relax, but prefers to be doing something. He helps around the house without hesitation …always. Recently we had to have a tree removed from our yard… my dad and Mark came to the rescue. I tried telling them to just hire someone, but bought hesitated to accept and decided to just do it  themselves. 20150107_115427

Women are made to give. They are adaptable and they love to please others. Women are always asking “what can I do for my man?” Women are thinking about the little things to do for you. The little notes to plant in your pockets. The dinners and romantic evenings she planned for the two of you. Basically all the things you as a man probably overlook and never gave a shit about! Hahaha. Women need to feel safe and they love acknowledgement! The “thank you” the “that dinner was amazing!” Not to get too much into it, because this article is about how women love men who labor, but to narrow it down to two fundamental needs a women has is acknowledgement and the sense of feeling “safe”.

As a man, how do you make a woman feel safe? Is it that you parade around like a bodyguard when you’re out in public? NO! I mean don’t get me wrong no woman wants to date a pansy, someone who can’t stand up for themselves or someone that wouldn’t confront a rude man who is trying to cause problems.

What I’m talking about is this,
The most important “safety” a woman cares about and needs is that the man she is with will always assume the role of the “Hunter”. Back in the days it literally was that, the men hunted and they brought home the food and items that would be used for shelter and survival. Obviously the tables have turned and there is no need for you to walk in to your home grabbing the fish by its head, but the “hunter” in you must be present.

menatwork

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

By hunting I mean, going out there and working. Producing. Cultivating. Improving your and your future partners life. Women despite the change in roles we have seen in this last century with many women hitting the work place and many times earning more income than their mates, still the inner desire and need to feel “safe” stems back to the man assuming the role as a “provider”.
Don’t buy into the hoop-la of “Independent woman” stuff. See a woman WILL and CAN be independent, but even if she is and needs nothing from you economically, KNOWING that you can be the provider if needed is exactly what every woman wants to know.

So men, get off your ass and step up your game.

On this LABOR day ask yourself what are you “LABORing” on. How are you creating value for yourself? Are you acquiring a new skill? Are you planning for the future? Are you increasing your network? All these are things that increase your value.

If you’re a conservative reading this article, you may ask “well what happened to the more important things like trust, love and understanding?” I never said those were not important, but keep in mind a woman can have that and find that with her best friend or some family member. The workings of a great relationship between male and female long term must also fulfill the female needs and prove that the man she is with can and will “take care” of her.

Then there are the men who think women are “gold diggers!” that is an insecure man’s way of thinking. He is thinking “oh she is going to use me” and if your dumb and don’t stand for yourself then a woman with bad intentions would use you, and who’s fault is that? Yours! Not the girls. You as a man also set your parameters and remember that ultimately you can never buy love. You can buy purses and vacations and jewelry, but never lust or love. If you turn her on you turn her on because of your energy with her not what you buy her. What you buy will only at best provide decent sex and a complain to hang out with you until she finds someone better. If that’s all your looking for then go ahead keep it up. If not, you must not rely on your finances alone.
Let me finish by telling you this. Men are like Cars. All have an engine, 4 tires, doors and if it’s a working car it turns on and drives. A woman shops around first by her emotion, what looks and smells good to her. Basically what turns her on sexually. After that, to keep her you must show you can be reliable and go the distance. The less you show her this the less she wants to “ride”. Your sex life diminishes your intimacy level decrease and next thing you know she will start telling you its ladies night every weekend!

So on LABOR day and all others Go To Work and like my favorite comedian Russell Peters says “Be-A-Man” these fundamental instincts we have are exactly that, fundamental despite the changes in society and our times women and men will continue to have basic fundamental needs.

Love & Marriage, My Thoughts, Relationships

Celebrate Valentines Day Everyday

Over priced flowers, heart shape box of chocolates, restaurants jam packed with people sardine style, over paying for a not so excellent food or service, guy rushing to nearest drug store to pick up a card that reads some generic phrase about who much this person loves you and the biggest day for a single man to score with the single ladies who are oh so desperate hitting up the local bar drinking 1 tequila shot to much and although they claim to be so “Anti- Valentines Day” wish up on a star that they had one… Welcome to Valentines Day!!!

Valentines Day can be quite exhausting and yes I know that was the longest run on sentence, but then again I don’t put this blog up to teach you how to write perfect English, It is simply to express some of my ideas and concepts and share so that you may be open enough to share yours. Wouldn’t it be best to celebrate valentines day everyday?

As much as I have dated I can confess that I have never celebrated Valentines Day. Now don’t get me wrong I am no loser who has never received flowers, chocolates, cards, gone on dinners, etc all the traditional stuff people do on this day, I am simply stating that I have never done any of the above on this day. Apparently, this day is intended for you to show your loved ones how much you care and love them. Now I understand why such a holiday would be created because
#1. Gives companies and businesses a reason to make more money.

#2. People are naturally crazy… meaning we get too caught up in our daily routine of work and drama that many of us loose sight of what is truly important in our lives including the people who make it worth while. So we need reminders….

If you are single it can be a pretty intimidating day when your co-workers of friends boast about the things their boyfriends of husbands did for them on Vday while you are sitting back daydreaming about what your ideal Valentine would do for you. I have even heard of women who go as far as to send themselves flowers!! If that is you…. its Ok we all have things we have done that we regret.

But chill out because the single most important thing I have learned about this day is how long does that feeling last? Do not be too impressed by how your friends boyfriends treat them at least do not judge them based on this one day. Ask or observe what is that “BF” or “Husband” like the day, week, or months AFTER Valentines Day.

I have observed way to many “cute” Valentines Day couples succumb to routines and end up loosing appreciation for each other literally hours after this day. I have seen how the fights start up again or how this “loving” boyfriend eyes wander at the sight of another woman the minute his is out of sight or how the neglect starts up again.

I guess this is why I am not the biggest fan of this day. Its as if some of you in relationships believe that this one day, that one card or dinner will make up for all the bulls*&^ you have put your significant other threw. It’s like “cramming” the night before a big exam, knowing you didn’t do what you were supposed to and hope that this 24 hour period somehow erases all that you have neglected the other 364 days of the year or that it can buy you enough credit to last you a few months before you care to show and express your love and appreciation.
And that ladies and gentlemen is why when so much “acting” is going on, it pushes me away from participating in it.

Don’t get me wrong… I accept Valentine day greetings, gifts, and goodies and I appreciate them. What I am asking you to think about is beyond this day. What will you do next Monday to show the people you love, that you love them? That you appreciate them? That you enjoy spending time with them?

When you are in a great relationship I believe it is Valentines Day everyday. That the nice dinners, time spent together, pointless “just because” gifts are truly special and their significance last so much longer. That the person and people you love remain in your thoughts and motivations long after this holiday is over. That their presence remains with you long term.

I have been blessed to be surrounded by loving friends, family and recently an amazing man who fill my life with love 365 days. their energy, love and thoughts about them remain with me 24hours a day. They motivate me to become more, to accomplish more, to appreciate and to love more. If you find yourself single on a day like to day first take inventory on the loving relationships that you do have and secondly do not seek the plush teddy bears, flowers to boast about, but spend time establishing and nurturing the relationships that exist in your life.

Happy Valentines Day To ALL!

To more long lasting beautiful and loving relationships.

My Thoughts, People Skills, Personal Growth

Do I Lack Confidence- How To Handle Sarcastic People

Many of you have secretly asked “Do I lack confidence?”. Why is it that I rather hide and not interact with people and prefer to stay to my self. Or maybe you find that you one have 1-2 people you socialize with. If this is the case you may lack confidence. But there is more to it and I will share one sure sign that you lack confidence if you react in a way that I will share.

A few days ago I asked “what makes someone a “jerk” and not liked while other “jerks” like TV personalities are admired? You ever notice how certain people adore TV personalities that one would describe as “jerks”  or “smart asses” such as Ari on Entourage, Gym teacher in Glee, the Vince Vaughns, but in real life these same people who are fanatic about these characters on TV do not like and get mad at similar personalities that happen to be their friends and a part of their real lives.

Why is it certain people appreciate sarcasm, truth and no bullshit on TV, but when it applies to them in real life they do not like it and get mad and hide?

Could it be that they lack confidence?    

Sarcasm

Sarcasm

 

A sure sign to know if you lack confidence in yourself is if you love watching these characters expose obvious things to other people and characters on TV, but if the Ari in their life ever points things out to them or of them… well they just run and hide

Why? I can only come up with one reason: Lack of confidence.

Knowing how to handle sarcastic people is a useful and helpful tool to help you gain more confidence. It is like a weight. The more you learn how to handle sarcasm the stronger and more confident you become. We all have been victims of sarcasm. I have many times been the center of being made fun of or people pointing out certain things about me. I have been made fun of or have been called on for something I did that may not have been the best. Or many a times have had the Vince Vaughns in my life point out the obvious about me. For example… I often times make mistakes on the proper pronunciation of words, or I walk with a very loud step or I am a control freak. My close friends that know me and know these things about me the “sarcastic” or “jerks” in my life…point it out. Often! My way of reacting is well to laugh. I know it’s true. I am a control freak. I do step loud as hell. English is my second language so I do make mistakes. If someone I know and care about and who more importantly I know they care about me points it out or makes fun of it, I simply don’t care and I acknowledge it and laugh it off.

How else should you react?
Should I get mad?
Annoyed?

If the same happened to you what would you do?

For the men out there who played any type of organized sport whether in school, on the street or semi pro I do not need to be in the locker room or practice to know that all men do to each other all day is make fun of each other. To talk about how slow you were at running drills or maybe how you have big boobs and need to lose weight or possibly how your feet stink. The list can go on and on. These type of things are part of the game and also part of growing up.

*****VERY IMPORTANT: I am not promoting bullying. Bullying comes from people who DO NOT KNOW YOU. ARE NOT YOUR FRIENDS. WHO DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOU and HOW HARASS YOU. If you feel you are being bullied contact someone you trust and of authority at your job, school or community.

I am talking about good old growing up! People who know you, like you, care about you, sweat & cry with you. Can you take a few not so positive comments from them?

I am not a mom yet, but I would teach my kids to learn how to handle a little sarcasm and the “jerks” they will have in their life. If my boy is tall and skinny you better believe I will teach him how to handle being called Jolly Green Giant! Or If my girl has curly hair like her momma you better believe I will teach her how to react and respond to people calling her frizz head.

How do you respond? How do you gain more confidence? ACKNOWLEDGE IT!

Say “yup I’m pretty dang tall aren’t I? Or maybe you are just short”

Say “Yeah my hair is a little wild today not behaving very well. It has a mind of its own and a zip code of its own”
I will share this story with you one night I was having dinner with a few friends one of which I have not seen in several years. This girl has the habit of completing your sentences for you. It’s like she will wait to hear the first 3 words of what you are going to say and then shout out the last 3! It is quite hilarious and she does it ALL the time…not even knowing! So myself and everyone else at that dinner table that night just openly pointed it out. We not only pointed it out, but every single time she did it we would all in unison yell out ” you just did it”. Then we began mocking her by us now being the ones that finished her sentences and everyone else’s sentences at that dinner table.

Question: How do you think the girl reacted?

Did she cry?
Was she upset at us and got up out of the table?
Did she say or think ” I don’t like them anymore…they are making fun of me”

Nope. She laughed. She laughed a lot.  And kept saying ” I really do that??” In disbelief and laughed and continued to joke with us.

Now having this type of reaction is not always the case. I have had many people in my life get mad or decide to avoid and hide. A guy I knew was dating a girl whose pronunciation was pretty bad on certain words properly. She had an accent nothing wrong with that so do I for certain words. So as a friend sometimes it would be pointed out or mocked. What was her reaction? Totally opposite of the previous girl! She took the opposite approach and got mad and decide to avoid and hide. Not only did she hide she just decided “we were no longer friends”.

Why is it some avoid and hide when people point out imperfections and or flaws in the, or there personality while others acknowledge it and laugh it off?

I believe it boils down to the magic word of CONFIDENCE.
I have met people who have imperfections in there body and honestly I could have hung out with them for years and never noticed until THEY point it out. Why? These people elude confidence and they do not let there imperfections hinder them.


Some of you may be saying “well Adriana not everyone is confident and can handle that so maybe those people should be left alone” I fancy this thought. Oh so some people are hanging out in the ocean on a raft that is sinking, but we should just leave them alone?? If you think taking a little bit of sarcasm is “tough”  you probably haven’t done or experienced much in life nor will you ever. The key here is being able to take truthful comments that are not intended to be hurtful. In fact the people who deliver the message are your FRIENDS. They are not people who purposely want to hurt you. When’s the last time someone so “evil” says “hummmmm let me be super mean and hurt this person soooo bad by ummm mocking the way my friend from Boston says ‘car'”?????  Really? That is hurtful and mean??

Common man!

So my point here is to remember that none of us are perfect and the sooner you start to accept that the sooner you will remove yourself from this avoidance of people. The sooner you will gain more confidence and the sooner you will live in truth. If you love truthful characters on TV and the big screen ask yourself if you really had a friend like that in real life would you appreciate there truthfulness or would you avoid them and hide?

Food Remodeling, Health & Fitness, My Thoughts

Should I Detox

Should I detox? Is a question many of us ask. I have asked that same question myself “Should I detox?” and although I do not claim to be a medical or health expert to claim it is good or not good for you. I will simply tell you I do it and I have been detoxing for the past 6 years. I like to do it at least two times a year. If I could I would do it quarterly. Some people are pretty hardcore and detox every other week! That is too much for me and I can’t handle that. But 2-4 times a year is something I can handle and like to do. So I am currently undergoing my annual cleansing. Many of you asked what I was doing. So here is not only what I am doing, because more important than that is the WHY and WHAT works for YOU.

Undergoing a Detox or a cleansing is not something for the weak minded or if you are considering it but if you are someone who is easily exhausted and have low blood pressure or may have a syndrome not recognized yet by a doctor, then I highly urge you to contact your doctor first before beginning any type of detox.

Secondly, you have to know WHY you would want to do a detox to know why detoxing is good for you.
Are you looking for a quick way to loose weight?
Do you feel yucky? Feel bloated and have been constipated?
Are you curious what all the hoopla is?

Well I do not claim to be an expert. I like many of you hit the internet to learn about this and also through my own experimentation and knowledge I have picked up by actual medical professionals that through the years have taught me more about this subject.

Why I am doing a cleanse?
Because I understand the importance of regular bowl movements. (a.k.a pooping, dropping kids off at the pond, taking the browns to the superbowl, etc) and mentally training your body to eat when you need the food, to break my “habits” of needing certain foods, and just because I figure if it doesn’t kill me and many people say it is healthy to do, then do Just Do It.

I often hear people, especially girls, be “proud” to announce “Oh, I do not poop very much, only once a day…” as if it makes them more girly or pretty to say you do not poop. Well I have news for ya sister, it is actually terrible! And a big sign that you are messed up!

As I learned through some naturalistic medical experts a healthy person should be pooping at least 2-3 times a day. Getting rid of stools and urine is your body’s main method of getting rid of toxic substances. Regular bowel movements are needed to prevent toxins that are released from the bloodstream into the intestines from being reabsorbed into the body. Getting fiber from food is important. Just think, if there is a subway at 72nd and another one tries to come in…. there is major backup. One has to go so it makes space for the other. Your digestion is kind of like that.

And I also learned about the different types of dookies….. such as…
1. The Shooting Bullets
2. The Submarine
3. The Little Snakes
4. The Messy All Over
5. The One That Makes You Hurt, Scratch and Tear

None of those are good. “your poop should come out smooth like a soft serve smoothie”. Which is why detoxing is good for you.

Why does are digestion start messing up? All the processed crap we eat! America is infamous for food that is “man-made” and filled with all kinds of hormones & pesticides all which end up finding a home in your little body.

How To Get Rid Of It?
I will share on my next blog. In the meantime ask questions and connect with me on FACEBOOK.

My Thoughts, Personal Growth

Truth Be Told – Charles Barkley ‘dirty dark secret’

Charles Barkley revelation of the ‘dirty dark secret’ is one of the most honest statements I’ve ever heard. The “dirty dark secret” about his race as he refers to it “Black people”, but I don’t believe it ends there. This dirty secret extends through all ethnicities, especially 1st generation kids. I believe that this type of negativity is not restricted to the black community…I believe all “minority” communities face it. Watch the video below to listen to this eye opening portion of the interview.

Can you relate to what Barkley said?

I can totally relate to what Charles Barkley states. I grew up in a town where the majority of the population was Mexican, being 1st generation Mexican my parents did all they could to raise my brother and I the best they could. I am sure they were not thinking “let’s raise a good “Mexican” kid or let’s make our little Mexican kid more “white”. I am sure they just thought “let’s be great parents”.

My brother and I were enrolled into swim lessons as kids, I was in a dance academy and my brother and I both played sports. We both learned how to play musical instruments and earned above average grades. Was that typical for the other “Mexican” kids in my city? Probably not. Later in high school I continued dance and became a cheerleader, played multiple sports, was in Advance Placement classes, got the chance to travel to Europe with my friends, became class president and got accepted into UCLA & USC…a lot of “non-Mexican” things as the loser kids would refer to it.

NCounty

College letters

Was I striving to be “non-Mexican” ?? I knew how to speak Spanish in fact in high school I started an after school program to teach other Spanish speakers how to improve their English. One year I raised money to fund a group of orphan children from Tijuana, Mexico to have teh chance to go to Disneyland. I never denied my Mexican race. I would have my “white” girlfriends listen to Spanish music with me and even watch TVNovelas with me….but to some Mexican kids I was “not Mexican enough”. Apparently I didn’t watch enough soccer or have an old English tatoo or wear dark lipstick or all the other things that group of Mexicans decided to do. I heard the remarks. I heard all the side comments some fellow Mexican kids would say…. luckily I was smarter, more stubborn than them and more competative to prove what I was doing was right and there was nothing wrong with it because I was doing what I wanted to do and be who I wanted to be.

I know many of you probably have your own fair share of stories and things you have gone through where kids or even today as adults, are told that you are not “Asian enough” or possibly have been given crap about dating outside your race. It is mind boggling to me how sometimes the people who hurt us or are the most discouraging are the same people who should be the most supportive. Bottom line is we all need to see eachother past a definition of race and do what we each individually want to do and become. If you are happy striving to become more, go for it! If you are happy being lazy and care not to work hard or thankful just to have your job, so be it! Only way to live is the way that seems most fitting to you.

Entrepreneur's Corner, My Thoughts, Personal Growth

How to Take a Mini-Retirement – The 4-Hour Workweek

I have been glued to reading “The Four Hour Work Week”  more so because I finally found someone who identified and clearly described exactly what I work so hard to build my life as. Time Ferris details hot to take a mini-retirement and have the continue throughout life rather than wait to just have one. Here is how to take a mini retirement The 4 Hour Workweek style.

One of my favorite phrases is “the birth of mini retirements and the death of vacations”. Time Ferris says “Why wait until you are 65 to start exploring and enjoying life? Why not take the usual 65 year old retirement and distribute it throughout life?”  

That is what I have decided to do and damn it feels good!   facebook_photo_download_2032623810632

I have always been someone who has had a problem with routine or following under someone else domain. I guess you can say I have always marched to the beat of my own drum. Many times I can say it has lead me to some trouble, but the success and enjoyable life experiences it has lead me to far outnumber the mistakes and failures. At the end of the day it is what you experience in life that you take with you, not what you were able to buy and own.
Mini retirements are reoccurring. Meaning you do not go one- once in a lifetime trip, you go on MANY and for a few weeks or even months at a time!. Many people my age get married and have that one extravagant honeymoon and then they succumb themselves to a mundane life of routine. How can routine be good for anyone??!!! Talk about loss of interest, passion, your brain even goes numb. I will discuss routine later in a different post, but this time I am simply sharing my recently identified title for the life I have chosen and choose to continue to live.    bored
True freedom is having time freedom. I am not and have never been impressed with fancy title or high salaries. I live in a city full of stuffy nosed wall street bankers and brokers who make “a lot of money”. But I also get to see and witness how they live. Have you ever taken a stroll down through the streets of wall street around 6-7pm? I remember years ago I had a meeting with a friend downtown and I walked through one of the streets. I was in awe by the sheer number of delivery bikes in the area. I glanced one way and saw almost like a scene in the schindler’s List hands flinging open to grab food as money was exchanged. The “rich” wall street folks were getting there dinner delivered.

 

Rich? Really? Well in my opinion that is far from it.

Everyone is entitled to there lifestyle they choose. I am simply voicing that I think this way of living is rather poor. To restrain yourself to vacationing and having a total of 14 “vacation” days a year or now a days 20 or 22 is not something worth giving up in my opinion the time to be home and have dinner amongst loved ones. Hey I guess if you cant stand your kids, wife, husband and or you don’t have any of this or care for it in your life, then hey, go for it and eat your dinner at your desk too. But not me. I chose not to.

I have not reached the level of success I have plans for, but I have devised a way to live the type of life I love and am happy with now as I only get to add to it. I have been called a gypsy, vagabond, and even was named the little “Travelocity Nome” by a friend.  My passion for travel and exploring is what motivates me to find alternatives ways to earn money, build cash flow and focus my time in businesses and careers that can support this addiction. Last year I visited New Orleans twice, spent 2 weeks in Italy seeing and exploring all the areas I had not yet seen in my previous trip to Italy and then 2 months later  took an entire month off and traveled across country visiting family with my boyfriend and puppies during the holidays.  Having the ability to do this brings me life!

What brings you happiness and life to your days?

Maybe it is the career you have now, maybe it isn’t?

Maybe it is teaching, but you don’t make much money… what is wrong with that?

Not everything valuable in life is measured by your salary. Think about what you are currently doing and what you would like to be doing. Mistakes made because of ambition or acceptable and can always be reversible or forgiven.

Think about what areas of your life need to be remodeled and share with me what are some things you would like to do or change.

Love & Marriage, My Thoughts, Personal Growth, Relationships, Travel

Make Time For Dinner

When was the last time you sat and enjoyed a dinner amongst friends? Was it last Thanksgiving? Or maybe your birthday? Well on my recent trip to Spain I learned to enjoy 2 hour dinners and NOT feel anxious… I know as a workaholic that I am I was surprised myself! I discovered and experienced life at a halt. I mean that in a good way. Not a halt like you are not progessing, but more of a halt that sometimes you do need to stop and smell the roses. Or in this case enjoy a lavish dinner, lots of wine and great conversation for a 4 hour period…and they call that “normal”. Americans may only do that a few times a year. Possibly during a birthday dinner, Christmas dinner and Thanksgiving and even then I doubt you really sit there and enjoy the conversations with the people next and in front of you for 3 hours. Or do you?
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Can you really have a 2 hour dinner with Spanish friends without getting anxious?? I was tested on my last trip. I passed! I actually really enjoyed it.
CNN recently had an article about 8 reason to make time for family dinner. Here were their 8 reasons:
1.Supper can be a stress reliever
2. Kids might learn to love their veggies
3. It’s the perfect setting for new foods
4. You control the portions
5. Healthy meals mean healthy kids
6. Family dinners help kids “just say no” to smoking, drugs, and drunk driving
7. Better food, better report card
8. Put a little cash in your pocket
more here: http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/25/living/family-dinner-h
That was CNNS reasons to make time for dinner. What are yours?
Well I can tell you that I learned a lot from this behavior of having and enjoying a meal. I learned to focus on one task and enjoy my meals and the company of good friends. I like many of you on Monday thru Friday have a quick dinner. My boyfriend and I either sit around the living room catching up on all the celebrity gossip shows or we are eating while we are catching up on emails or internet browsing. Weekends is when we induldge in good enjoyable dinners, but never to the extent of the Spaniards. So I learned to enjoy more. To focus on dinner when it is dinner. To enjoy my meals and the company  I am with. I should have figured this out years ago! As an ex fat tortilla girl one key factor in maintaining good healthy weight is chewing! yes chewing! lol Thinking about what you are eating and enjoying your food to fulfill your craving. But I didnt learn. It wasnt untill I traveled to Spain that I learned to enjoy dinners daily.
So just a quick tip that I am sure will only enrich your life and your experience. Take time to have a dinner not just feed yourself. Slow down. Put the email away. Try to even turn off your TV. Sit. Eat. Talk. Enjoy!
My Thoughts, People Skills, Personal Growth

You Can’t Photoshop Your Personality

Money can buy nearly everything except for true love, meaningful relationships, and that something we all are in search of… Happiness.
Some people or companies try hard…real hard to sell you that they can make you happy, but deep down inside it is a lot more complex and unique than it coming in a box. Truth is you can’t Photoshop your personality.
Today’s post isn’t too deep and esoteric of a topic as happiness, but it is an important one. It is one that I believe makes life more enjoyable and one that helps you create a better life. It is about something you take with you everywhere. It gives people a reason to create a judgement about you and decide whether or not they like you, want to date you, hire you or marry you!
It’s your personality! And it cannot be photoshopped! But it can be fixed and if you need professional help, Well I take it back…money can help you to learn how to develop yours into something worth hanging out with just hang out and be coached by me!

If you don’t like your boobs you can buy new ones!
If you look fat, you can take away inches!
If your not very worldly you can learn and educate yourself more
I can go on and on about things we can quickly change cosmetically and women and men do it all the time.
But did you know the one thing you can’t physically change is the one that can get you the most results in life?
More friends, more dates, better relationships and more success?

That is true, you can’t photoshop that ugly personality. Ahh the little thing called a personality!
Ugh have I met some stanky ones, stale ones, desperate ones and just plain boooooring!
uglypersonality
Signs you may need a personality make over

1. You still only have the same 4 friends from the neighborhood or college
2. Your at a dead end job
3. You find it hard to carry a conversation with someone and actually prefer that people don’t talk to you.
4. You give one word answers when someone tries to ask you a question
5. Around a group of people you tend to not talk to anyone and cling on to the one friend you do know or the arm of your boy/girlfriend.

If you are guilty of any of the above then I suggest you take into consideration how to be friendlier, funner, and just simply to learn the skill of conversation and rapport.
This skill alone can transform your life!

My Thoughts, Personal Growth

Why Being Alone For Christmas Rocks!

Why being alone for Christmas rocks!

In Spanish we have a saying that goes “Mas vale solo que mal acompanada (i cant spell excuse me)” basically ” Better to be alone than in bad company” I am sending warm thoughts and greetings and wishing everyone to be with good company and the best during this time of year. This is the month when people “let loose” we tend to party a little more, be a little more courageous in approaching women or men, we are more open with our feelings, finally say the things we have been meaning to say, and in general have a deeper appreciation for who and what we have.

This is also the time of year many of you who are used to big family gatherings or have been in a relationship for awhile and may find yourself sharing a Christmas by yourself, get a little emotional on me. Im going to talk about why being alone is one of the best and most amazing ways for self growth and new exciting experiences.

In past years my Christmas has always been spent with family or filled with a lot of people or in a relationship. This year is quite different. I am single, I just relocated to NYC so I am not traveling back to where my family is and I am spending it doing non traditional Christmas things. Doing it like the Jewish people do year after year after year, treating it like any other day.

Many of you get all cry baby on me and I am here to share with you that is the wrong approach! In fact this Christmas has been and is already set to be one to remember!

I can’t say that I have been completely alone, im very fortunate to have some very close intimate friends here to spend it with, but as the saying goes sometimes “less, does = to more”.

Started “Christmas” with a not so traditional greek lunch with a close friend then being new to Manhattan I spotted out a wine bar that was having a Christmas party so my friends and I decided to make that the place for the night. We started the night early 6pm to be exact! Hahaha the events and what I learned after really opened me up to sometimes that “untraditional” can be very rewarding.

Within a span of a few hours I met many locals, owners of bars in the neighborhood, was invited into people’s homes for their Christmas, and really got to spend time and appreciate the close friends I do have.
Many times in a world full of “mine, mine, mine” or “ I want,want,want” we tend to take our “acquiring” nature into the world of people and relationships. We think “friends” or your “BF or GF” is just another statistic and forget to appreciate and nurture that relationship. We get flooded or bombarded by the “routine” by thoughts of “it will always be this way” but its not. Things change, things happen and sometimes it is healthy to step out of your “routine” and experience something new.
If you work somewhere and your daily routine is the same. You take same transportation to work, take same roads, or streets, same times, you will realize you run into the exact same people.
Try this, next week leave 10minutes earlier, take a different road, walk on a different street, enter at a different door and wah-lah! New opportunities, new experiences, just like that!

The point is this, when you get yourself out of the mentality that your “alone” or that “this sucks” you quickly open yourself up to new experiences and realize that really, your life is filled with great people that you take for granted and that even more powerful there are many more great people you are yet to meet, if you just open yourself up.

So to all you Christmas singles not spending time with your family this year, see it as a blessing and instead of mopping around or getting all pansy on me, enjoy it! Be open to new things, new people and new connections.

Wishing you all a Merry Christmas!

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