Browsing Tag

friends

Love & Marriage

Love In All Forms

Love in all forms. Happy first week of February! The month best known for love being in the air with millions of people celebrating Valentine’s Day. While millions celebrate many more millions dread this day in fear of not having that special someone in their lives. To those people I say:WAKE UP! Love is NOT only about being in a relationship or constantly being in a state of wanting. It is about valuing and developing all relationships in your life. Friends, family, work relationships.

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I want to take this time to remind us all not to neglect all other relationships in our lives.

The relationship between you and your significant other. – How has that been? Have you been communicating well? Have you each taken the time to show eachother in your own way appreciation for eachother? Have you taken time to be alone and go on a date?

Your relationship with your children? or One with your parents? – How is that communication? Have you taken time to spend some quality time with them? Do you know what is new in their lives? Successes or struggles or goals?

Relationship with friends – Have you taken the time to check in with them? Sometimes a simple Instagram or Facebook stalking can help…. see what has been going on in their lives and comment on things if that is all the time you have! Picking up the phone of course is always preferred, but with busy lives I understand it makes it difficult to carve out sometime.

…and your pets! Don’t forget them! I swear they have better emotional instincts than we do! They know and feel your love and attention so if you have been busy show them some love and plan a dog park weekend!

Take some time this month to remember and acknowledge all “Loving” relationships in your life.

Love & Marriage, My Thoughts, Personal Growth, Relationships, Travel

Make Time For Dinner

When was the last time you sat and enjoyed a dinner amongst friends? Was it last Thanksgiving? Or maybe your birthday? Well on my recent trip to Spain I learned to enjoy 2 hour dinners and NOT feel anxious… I know as a workaholic that I am I was surprised myself! I discovered and experienced life at a halt. I mean that in a good way. Not a halt like you are not progessing, but more of a halt that sometimes you do need to stop and smell the roses. Or in this case enjoy a lavish dinner, lots of wine and great conversation for a 4 hour period…and they call that “normal”. Americans may only do that a few times a year. Possibly during a birthday dinner, Christmas dinner and Thanksgiving and even then I doubt you really sit there and enjoy the conversations with the people next and in front of you for 3 hours. Or do you?
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Can you really have a 2 hour dinner with Spanish friends without getting anxious?? I was tested on my last trip. I passed! I actually really enjoyed it.
CNN recently had an article about 8 reason to make time for family dinner. Here were their 8 reasons:
1.Supper can be a stress reliever
2. Kids might learn to love their veggies
3. It’s the perfect setting for new foods
4. You control the portions
5. Healthy meals mean healthy kids
6. Family dinners help kids “just say no” to smoking, drugs, and drunk driving
7. Better food, better report card
8. Put a little cash in your pocket
more here: http://www.cnn.com/2011/10/25/living/family-dinner-h
That was CNNS reasons to make time for dinner. What are yours?
Well I can tell you that I learned a lot from this behavior of having and enjoying a meal. I learned to focus on one task and enjoy my meals and the company of good friends. I like many of you on Monday thru Friday have a quick dinner. My boyfriend and I either sit around the living room catching up on all the celebrity gossip shows or we are eating while we are catching up on emails or internet browsing. Weekends is when we induldge in good enjoyable dinners, but never to the extent of the Spaniards. So I learned to enjoy more. To focus on dinner when it is dinner. To enjoy my meals and the company  I am with. I should have figured this out years ago! As an ex fat tortilla girl one key factor in maintaining good healthy weight is chewing! yes chewing! lol Thinking about what you are eating and enjoying your food to fulfill your craving. But I didnt learn. It wasnt untill I traveled to Spain that I learned to enjoy dinners daily.
So just a quick tip that I am sure will only enrich your life and your experience. Take time to have a dinner not just feed yourself. Slow down. Put the email away. Try to even turn off your TV. Sit. Eat. Talk. Enjoy!
My Thoughts, People Skills, Personal Growth, Relationships

When Nobody Likes You

I hate to be a Debbie Downer with a topic, I actually had my doubts on whether I should write about this or not because I feel very strongly and I am against Bullies, people who are mean to others and those who feel are superior to others and like to belittle others. In fact this post is more in support to all those who have been bullied or have to put up with peoples uncalled for and nasty ways of dealing with people… hence, THEY are the ones nobody likes and those whom the rest of us can learn from their “relationship failures”.

I speak a lot about dating and developing good relationships…true most of the time it revolves around love …. That is because I can’t help, but to be a romantic! But what happens when you are the one who nobody likes. For example, recently I came across this:

 

Why is it that some people even on a social space like Facebook where people whored around the word “friends” some people just can’t get any?? And I know some are thinking “Well I never go on Facebook and I don’t care about interacting with people on their I rather interact in person”. I agree to the rather interact in person, but not so much with ignoring what today is pretty much a way of communication and living whether we like it or not… Virtual communication is here to stay people! So GET CONNECT PEOPLE!  Umm.. go ahead and LIKE my page and connect with me now while your at it : CONNECT WITH ME

Now the easy thinig to say is “well they rather have a small group of friends than be liked by everybody” and I agree some people do choose to have a small intimate group of friends, but I also feel that is an excuse for the “nobody likes them folks” to explain their lack of friends and being liked. You see in my opinion having few friends can be looked at in a two ways:

  1. You Have Few Friends Because YOU Choose It;
  2. You Have Few To NO Friends Because Nobody Likes You.

Or

They way I strive to be build my life is with this philosophy:

Have Close Nit Circle of Friends And Be Well Liked And Respected By Many!

Why not! You can develop that if you choose too.

So from those folks that “nobody likes” there is something to learn from a failure of friends.

So I and you should  ask also :

What do these people do to repeal so many people?

How do they act?

 

Here are a few things I have noticed and will point out about these loners:

  1. They talk badly about someone to others, and then go hangout with that person as if they are their best friend.

“ Yeah so&so is such a B***! I cant stand her..you know what she did…”

“Oh so&so of course! Lets hang out this weekend! I’m dying too see you!”

 

2. They are always devaluing your own accomplishments and speaking about how theirs are so much better.

“That’s cool about your companies bonus I guess…my company gave me a much bigger bonus…”

 

3. Talking way too much about themselves in a show off type of way

“So yeah like I have sooooo many friends and were just going to have like 3 weddings, 2 honeymoons and top notch all open bar”

“OMG like I cant walk down the street without a guy hollering at me. I have great legs, they just cant stop looking at me”

 

4.They do not acknowledge people

Scenario: Loner joins the rest of a dinner table full of people, by just sliding in and not saying hi to anyone and they leave without saying goodbye.

5. Are fair weather friends  – Friends only when it is convenient to them.

6. Have a critique about everything you do!

7. When in a relationship they seclude everyone except their significant other.

Girlfriend/Boyfriend in town or they just got one = You are forgotten about.

8. Have no loyalty or appreciation. Have my fair share of these folks!

9. They are the “obnoxious drunk” or the extreme “stiffy” friend.

So your at the bar and everyone is drinking or dancing or sharing their steamy s*x stories, but that one clearly-not-religious friend of yours is Mr./Mrs. Closed.- ANNOYING! Why even go hang out??!!

Or you go out and they are the ones drinking & talking so loudly you start wondering if you are out with a friend or a little kid.

 

Many of have known or know people like this. Some even continue to give these people the time and day ! Why? Not sure, maybe because they feel bad which is a very noble thing to think or feel you are “helping” them. But I believe what makes relationships strong and friendships valuable is when someone can knock some sense in you and not just allow you to keep making the same mistakes. Sometimes the most noble and helpful thing you can do for someone is to bluntly show them the effects of their actions.

Hey do me a favor, let us hear your opinions and comment below and if you LIKED IT , then help me

 

To building great friendships, sharing love and finding your soulmate!